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Our fallen heroes’ families deserve more than outdated survivor benefits
From the moment you get that knock on the door to the moment you’re handed a folded American flag, Gold Star families face a lifetime shaped by loss. Last week we observed Gold Star Spouses Day on April 5. April is also the Month of the Military Child. I invite you to reflect on the sacrifices of our military families, especially those whose loved one paid the ultimate sacrifice.
Losing a loved one in service to our country hits differently. These families are asked to carry on with strength and dignity, embodying the very ideals their loved ones fought to defend. It’s often called an honor no one wants.
I recently had the privilege of meeting with members of the Gold Star Wives of America in my Washington, D.C., office. Their resilience, grace and determination to advocate for military families left a lasting impression. Their stories are powerful reminders of the human cost of service.
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The sacrifice of our military families can’t be overstated. Every lost service member comes with ripple effects — lives disrupted, futures derailed and families left with only memories and a folded flag.
As the father of a beautiful little girl, I can’t imagine the pain of losing a child. One Gold Star mother recently told my office about losing her son in 2010 to an IED in Afghanistan. She said, “Increasing the death benefit will help new Gold Star Families in many ways.” For her, this initial bridge payment helped cover travel expenses for family members who wanted to pay their respects; for others, it helped cover funeral costs or other bills left unpaid.
Grief doesn’t end after the funeral. Families have to come to grips with the fact that their loved one will never have another birthday or celebrate another Christmas. Spouses will mourn anniversaries and have to decide when or if to stop wearing a wedding ring.
Gold Star children will have to live with disappointment for the rest of their lives, facing the reality of walking down the aisle without a father or picking out a wedding dress without a mother. These are all the tragic possibilities that every service member knows they are risking when they sign up to serve and the realities far too many have to face.
Beyond emotional hardship, there are practical concerns too. Young spouses often put their own careers on hold to support their military husband or wife. When the worst happens, they now need to figure out how to financially support themselves and their children, and all while navigating extreme grief.
The reality these families face underscores a critical question: Why haven’t survivor benefits kept pace with modern needs? The initial payment families receive upon the death of their loved one has not been updated in over 20 years. Other benefits, including Social Security, military retirement and federal salaries, have been adjusted for inflation, but not “death gratuity” payments for our military families. It’s time to correct this wrong.
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That’s why I introduced the bipartisan Honoring Our Nation’s Obligation to Remember (HONOR) Gold Star Families Act. This legislation would increase the military death gratuity — often called the bridge payment — from $100,000 to $200,000 for the families of fallen service members.
The bill also adds a cost-of-living adjustment so that future payments automatically rise with inflation, helping ensure continued support for Gold Star families over time. This legislation was co-led by Armed Services Committee members Jen Kiggans, R-Va., and Jill Tokuda, D-Hawaii. It was also endorsed by the American Gold Star Mothers, the Gold Star Wives of America, Military-Veterans Advocacy and the National Guard Association of the United States (NGAUS).
Recent losses remind us that this burden is ongoing. Take the recent conflict with Iran, where 13 service members have lost their lives. One of those soldiers was Capt. Cody Khork, a 35-year-old man who, according to his family, was deeply patriotic and was defined by “love of country.”
Another service member who lost her life was Sgt. 1st Class Nicole Amor. She is survived by a son in his senior year of high school and a daughter in fourth grade. Chief Warrant Officer 3 Robert Marzan was also killed in the conflict.
His niece wrote on Facebook: “You’re our Hero with a servant’s heart, you lead with love and bravery, you gave the ultimate sacrifice for our country, an honorable soldier, and I believe God welcomed you Home with open arms saying, ‘Well done, my son, well done.’”
The loss and heartache these families are experiencing right now cannot be quantified, but we can keep them in our prayers as they grieve, and we can support them in a meaningful way.
That’s why I made the HONOR Gold Star Families Act retroactive. My bill will apply to all families who have lost a loved one in Operation Epic Fury, regardless of when my bill is signed into law.
Our Gold Star moms, dads, children, spouses and siblings have given so much for our nation. It’s time we give back to them — and this bill is just one way to do that.
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Al Sharpton says America’s 250th anniversary is not a ‘celebration’ for Black people, calls it ‘crazy’
MS NOW host Reverend Al Sharpton said the United States’ upcoming 250th anniversary is not a “celebration” for Black people and that it’s “crazy” to expect them to celebrate it.
“They’re going to celebrate the 250th anniversary of the country July 4th, but that’s not our celebration,” Sharpton said at the National Action Network’s 35th Anniversary National Convention on Wednesday.
He continued, “We were slaves then, and they celebrate signing the Declaration of Independence 1776. We were not even emancipated until 1863. So I don’t know what everybody getting ready for a celebration [for]. You know that it seems crazy for me to have on the birthday hat at your birthday party. That ain’t my party.”
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Sharpton suggested that he should hold a separate rally in Philadelphia and expressed concern that young citizens were not aware of Black people’s “background” thanks to President Donald Trump and Gov. Ron DeSantis, R-Fla., attempting to remove woke aspects in education.
“When White kids hear us talking about reparations or affirmative action, they think it’s an attack because they don’t know what their granddaddy did to us,” Sharpton said.
Sharpton has been a critic of removing diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI) from businesses and schools, threatening boycotts against businesses that pulled back DEI initiatives since Trump’s second term began.
He also accused DeSantis of trying to “erase Black history” after his administration demanded revisions to an AP African American studies course in 2023.
Rep. Al Green, D-Texas, who spoke with Sharpton earlier in the convention, also emphasized the importance of remembering the nation’s history with slavery, advocating for the formation of a “Department of Reconciliation” to address it.
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“We need a Secretary of Reconciliation just as we have a Secretary of Education, a Secretary of Labor. We need a Secretary of Reconciliation who would report directly to a president, not this president, directly to a president. And the job would be to reconcile our differences,” Green said.
He added, “And that reconciliation, for me, I say this with no shame, no embarrassment. I am unapologetically Black, and I say this: that would include reparations. Reparations for the 240 years of free labor that people still benefit today from and that we were locked out of opportunities along the way while they were benefiting.”
Imagine, for a moment, the alternative. In the hours immediately following a successful decapitation strike, instead of criticism and handwringing, the European Union and NATO leadership step forward in lockstep with Washington and Jerusalem and say: We stand shoulder to shoulder with the United States and Israel; Iran will never possess a nuclear weapon; and the removal of this leadership has made the world safer.
Think about how Tehran would have processed that—not as a tactical setback, but as strategic isolation. Think about how Beijing and Moscow would have read it: a West that is unified, decisive, and willing to act in concert. That kind of clarity doesn’t just end a news cycle—it reshapes behavior.
Instead, what we saw was hesitation. Even NATO Secretary General Mark Rutte acknowledged, in effect, that some allies were slower to respond than the moment demanded. That matters. Because in moments like this, speed and unity are not cosmetic—they’re strategic.
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I’ve spent enough time inside the system—both in business and as U.S. ambassador to the European Union—to recognize when frustration is tactical and when it’s structural. Donald Trump’s irritation with NATO falls squarely into the latter category. It’s not a passing complaint. It’s a fundamental disagreement about what the alliance is supposed to do—and whether it still has the will to do it.
NATO proudly defines itself as a defensive organization. Fine. But let’s be clear about what “defense” actually means in 2026. It does not mean waiting politely until the next missile hits or the next proxy attack kills Americans or Israelis. Defense, in the real world, includes deterrence, disruption and, when necessary, decisive action against actors who have spent decades making their intentions clear.
Iran has been running that playbook for 47 years: dead American soldiers, attacks on shipping, and a relentless campaign against Israel, one of the West’s most important allies. This isn’t theoretical. It’s not episodic. It’s sustained hostility.
So when the United States moves to degrade that threat, even in a limited and targeted way, the expectation from Washington—particularly from Trump—isn’t that NATO jumps into the fight. It’s far simpler than that. Let us use bases. Give us airspace. Provide political cover. Stand with us publicly.
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And yet, time and again, the response from parts of Europe is hesitation, legal hand-wringing and carefully calibrated distance.
That’s what’s driving Trump’s frustration.
Let’s address the issue of advance notice, because it’s become a talking point. Critics argue that not fully briefing allies ahead of sensitive operations is disrespectful or destabilizing. That’s a Washington talking point that doesn’t survive contact with reality.
In an alliance this large, with this many domestic constituencies and internal divisions, leaks are not hypothetical—they’re a certainty. Anti-war factions, staff-level dissent, political maneuvering—it all creates risk. And when you’re talking about high-value targets or leadership decapitation, surprise isn’t a luxury. It’s the mission.
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The psychological impact of those operations matters as much as the physical outcome. You want the adversary disoriented, off-balance and unsure of what comes next. That only works if you preserve operational integrity. So no—this isn’t about sidelining allies. It’s about making sure the mission succeeds.
And let’s not pretend NATO is operating in a vacuum. Allied governments know when tensions are escalating. They see force posture changes. They understand, at a strategic level, what’s coming. The idea that they’re blindsided is more political theater than operational truth.
What happens after is what really matters—and that’s where the alliance keeps falling short.
Instead of a unified response—something as simple and powerful as “when and where do you need us?”—we get fragmentation. Statements about escalation. Concerns about legality. Efforts to create daylight between Washington and European capitals.
From a geopolitical standpoint, that’s a mistake.
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Adversaries like Iran are not just watching what the United States does. They’re watching how aligned the West is when it does so. A united front—even if only the United States and Israel are conducting strikes—has enormous psychological impact. It signals that the alliance is cohesive, that political backing is firm and that there’s no easy way to divide and exploit.
When that unity cracks, even rhetorically, it invites testing. It tells Tehran there’s room to maneuver, to push incrementally, to escalate in ways that stay below the threshold of a unified response. Over time, that raises the cost of deterrence and increases the risk of a much larger conflict down the road.
Trump understands this instinctively. He’s not looking for consensus for its own sake. He’s looking for leverage.
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And leverage, particularly with regimes like Iran, doesn’t come from endless negotiation. It comes from pressure—economic, military, psychological. Negotiations become productive when the other side believes the alternative is worse. Until then, they’re just buying time.
That’s not a theoretical critique. It’s an observed pattern.
European leaders often take a different view, rooted in decades of prioritizing diplomacy and avoiding escalation. I understand that instinct. But there’s a difference between diplomacy backed by strength and diplomacy that substitutes for it.
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If the latter becomes the default, you don’t get stability. You get erosion.
And eventually, you get adversaries who believe they can act with relative impunity—until the only options left are far more extreme.
This is where burden-sharing comes back into focus. The United States still carries a disproportionate share of NATO’s financial and military load. That’s not controversial—it’s arithmetic. Even NATO Secretary General Mark Rutte has acknowledged that Europe has been slow to step up on defense spending and responsiveness.
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So when Washington asks for access, cooperation or even just unambiguous political support, it’s not an unreasonable request. It’s the basic expectation of an alliance where one member is doing the heavy lifting.
What Trump is effectively saying is this: if we’re underwriting the system, the system needs to work when it matters.
Now, to be fair, European governments are not operating in a vacuum. Domestic politics matter. Public opinion matters. There is deep skepticism about military engagement, particularly in the Middle East. Leaders have to navigate that reality.
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But leadership is not about mirroring public hesitation. It’s about shaping public understanding—especially when the stakes are rising.
There are moments when you have to bring your population along, not hide behind it. Moments when the right answer is not to deflect, but to lead.
This is one of those moments.
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Because the alternative is a slow erosion of deterrence. A pattern where the United States acts, Europe distances itself and adversaries adapt. That’s not a stable equilibrium—it’s a glide path to a larger crisis.
And here’s the uncomfortable truth: if that crisis comes after years of incremental escalation, the options available at that point will be far worse than the ones being debated today.
That’s the strategic risk embedded in Europe’s current posture.
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Trump’s approach—pressure first, negotiation second—isn’t universally popular. But it’s grounded in a clear understanding of how regimes like Iran operate. They don’t respond to goodwill gestures. They respond to credible threats.
Or, to put it more bluntly: negotiations tend to work when the other side feels like it is on the ground, bleeding, with a gun to its national forehead.
That’s not elegant language. But it reflects a real-world dynamic.
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So the question for NATO isn’t whether it agrees with every American decision or every presidential instinct. That’s not how alliances work. The question is whether it’s prepared to act like a strategic partner when it counts.
Because in the end, alliances are judged by behavior, not by communiqués.
Right now, there’s a gap between what NATO says it is and how parts of it are behaving under pressure. Trump is calling that out—forcefully, sometimes inelegantly, but not inaccurately.
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Closing that gap doesn’t require Europe to become something it’s not. It requires clarity, consistency and a willingness to stand shoulder to shoulder—even if the operational burden falls primarily on the United States.
Sometimes leadership means explaining to your public why action is necessary.
Sometimes it means acting first and bringing them along after.
And sometimes, it simply means answering the call with the words that, right now, we’re not hearing nearly enough:
“When and where do you need us?”
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