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Backseat grillmeisters are the absolute worst and other petty complaints about BBQing
It’s Wednesday, which means it’s time to slather on some sunscreen and get ready for some warm-weather whining in an all-new edition of The Gripe Report!
We’re just days away from Memorial Day — the unofficial start of summer — but, as I mentioned in Tuesday’s edition of Nightcaps, it should really just be accepted as the official start of summer.
Because while not everyone lives in a part of the country where the weather is nice enough to BBQ all year long, it may be the first time you dust off the grill, smoker, or flat-top for the year.
I don’t care what science says; that is the start of summer.
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So, we’re talking BBQ this week, and as great as it is, there is still plenty to gripe about.
Good BBQ takes time, and that can be one of the biggest pains in the ass about it.
There’s just no way around it: if you want to smoke a brisket or a pork shoulder, clear your schedule.
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Sure, with the advent of pellet smokers and Bluetooth thermometers, you can be untethered from your smoker to some degree, but you’re still going to need to do some degree of babysitting.
This is a real pain when your wife says something to the effect of, “Everyone is coming over for lunch at 1,” at which point you do some mental meat math about how the pork butt you’re going to smoke will probably take eight to 10 hours and then needs another hour to sit.
Well, set that alarm.
But here’s the thing: while I just complained about how long BBQing takes, that’s one of the things that makes it great. I love getting up while it’s still dark, firing up the grill, and watching it while I drink coffee for the first few hours.
That’s honestly part of the experience, and what an experience!
I’m not much of a BBQ snob. I’m not like, “You have to do X for it to be real BBQ,” or “The only BBQ that will enter my piehole has to have Y.”
All I ask is that it’s good.
I know that’s subjective, but there’s nothing worse than bad BBQ, and that’s because of the letdown that comes with it.
If someone says, “Hey, let’s go to this BBQ place I know of,” you’re already drooling on yourself thinking of putting yourself into a voluntary, brisket-fueled food coma.
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But then you go and find it’s kind of meh, and then you’re upset that you just got BBQ cucked.
It’s happened to me, and it sucks, so be wary.
Speaking of snobs, I’m not a fan of the guys who insist that all BBQ is s–t unless it comes from within the city limits of where they grew up or currently live.
It’s like a guy who says he likes one kind of music and only listens to it.
I like rock too, but you’re missing out by not dipping into blues, jazz, classical, hip-hop, etc.
That’s BBQ to me. Kansas City style is great. Texas style is great. The Carolinas have great BBQ. Alabama white sauce is good. The modern version of BBQ can be really great.
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It’s okay to have a preference; that’s natural. What I’m asking is that you not rip a deuce on other styles of BBQ just because they’re not the one from your hometown.
No one is going to banish you from Texas if you admit that Carolina BBQ is good.
You will not be drawn and quartered by folks in Kansas City if you say you prefer a simple dry rub to something slathered in sauce.
Actually, they might…
One of my biggest problems with BBQ is myself.
As is the case with anything I do, I am my worst critic, and boy, has that ruined a meal or two for me and others.
I’m not saying I did anything crazy, but I have brought the mood down like a hockey player who just deflected a game-winning goal into his own net.
“Yeah, y’know, just really disappointed. I feel like I let everyone down tonight. We’ll just have to regroup, come back, and execute better next time…“
I just hate putting in the time to make something and have it suck. I remember one time I made some pork belly burnt ends that weren’t inedible, but not to my liking. That ruined them even more because I just sat there thinking about how I should’ve done something differently.
Well, there’s always next time… unless you screw up so bad that you make everyone sick, in which case you should probably stop.
It’s almost a cliché at this point, but whenever there’s a cookout, dudes are drawn to the grill or the smoker like a moth is drawn to a porch light.
I feel like most of the time, they’re just there to spectate (and silently judge), but occasionally, you get a guy who feels the need to start dictating what the grillmeister is supposed to do.
Flip this. Turn that. Move this. Stab that with a fork. Don’t stab that with a fork.
Everyone has their own way of doing things on the grill, and as long as you get a good result, who cares?
Now this isn’t to say I’m not looking for tips on how to get better. I’m always looking for them.
That’s how you unlock the secrets to great BBQ. I was once told to use mayo as a binder when I smoke a turkey breast, and — what do you know? — it’s great.
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But when someone is in the midst of grilling up some burgers or bratwursts, that’s not the time to start spitting some knowledge.
…
That’s all for this smoky, saucy edition of The Gripe Report!
Feel free to send in your gripes for the next one: [email protected]
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Kristi Noem Shares Huge Relationship News After Months Of Speculation
After months of public scrutiny, damaging revelations and signs of turmoil behind the scenes, a major change in former Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem’s personal life has now become official.
Noem has filed for divorce from her husband, Bryon Noem, bringing their marriage of more than three decades toward an end.
Court documents filed in South Dakota cite “irreconcilable differences” as the reason for the split. The filing was submitted April 6 but did not appear on Hamlin County’s online court system until Monday.
The couple married in 1992 and share three adult children.
The filing follows months of controversy surrounding Bryon’s reported private online activity, including allegations of explicit exchanges with adult models and participation in an online cross-dressing fetish community.
Photos published earlier this year reportedly showed Bryon wearing pink shorts, a crop top and exaggerated prosthetic breasts as part of what was described as a “bimbofication” fetish.
He was also reported to have sent at least $25,000 to online models through PayPal and Cash App while allegedly using the alias “Jason Jackson.”
One model said she discovered his identity after accidentally calling a number and hearing a voicemail greeting for Noem Insurance, the South Dakota insurance agency Bryon operates.
A spokesman for Kristi said at the time that she was “devastated” and that the family had been “blindsided” by the revelations.
Asked about the divorce proceedings by a South Dakota news outlet, Bryon offered little indication that he planned to discuss the matter publicly.
“I can’t comment right now.”
For members of Kristi’s family, however, the split apparently did not come as a surprise.
Kristi’s mother, Corinne Arnold, said in July that her daughter had already told relatives she intended to end the marriage and had hired an attorney in Sioux Falls.
“It has been difficult, but we knew this was coming, that they were going to get divorced,” Arnold told the Daily Mail.
“I feel bad, sick that they’re getting a divorce, but what else can you do?” she added.
By that point, Bryon had reportedly moved out of the couple’s Castlewood home and was living approximately 20 miles away.
The marriage had also faced years of public speculation surrounding Kristi’s relationship with longtime political adviser Corey Lewandowski.
Both Noem and Lewandowski have denied allegations that they had a romantic affair, and no independently verified evidence has publicly established that such a relationship occurred.
The two were photographed together in Minnesota in August, including at a lunch and while cycling near Lake Minnetonka.
Their professional relationship had previously attracted scrutiny during Noem’s tenure at the Department of Homeland Security, where Lewandowski served as an unpaid adviser.
During a congressional hearing in March, Noem was directly questioned about allegations involving Lewandowski and dismissed the questioning as tabloid material.
The turmoil surrounding her marriage intensified around the same period that she left the Department of Homeland Security and later assumed a State Department position as special envoy for the Shield of the Americas.
President Donald Trump also publicly reacted after reports concerning Bryon’s alleged online activity surfaced.
“Wow, well, I feel badly for the family if that’s the case, that’s too bad.”
Noem later returned to Pierre, South Dakota, for the unveiling of a life-sized bronze statue honoring her tenure as governor.
Her mother and grandchildren attended the ceremony.
Bryon did not.
After months of reported separation, family acknowledgment of the impending split and intense public attention surrounding the couple’s marriage, the matter has now moved into court.
More than three decades after Kristi and Bryon Noem married, their divorce filing makes the breakup official.
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BREAKING: FBI Rocked By Sudden Shocking Resignation
One of FBI Director Kash Patel’s top deputies is abruptly leaving the bureau, creating another opening at the highest levels of an agency already undergoing major organizational changes.
Andrew Bailey, the former Missouri attorney general who has served as one of the FBI’s co-deputy directors, announced Monday that he is stepping down after roughly a year at the bureau and returning home to his family in Missouri.
His final day will be Friday, Oct. 2.
“With great pride in what we have accomplished, I am announcing that I am stepping down to return to my family in Missouri,” Bailey said.
Bailey joined the FBI in 2025 after leaving the Missouri attorney general’s office and became part of an unusual leadership structure under Patel, serving alongside another co-deputy director.
His departure comes as Patel continues implementing major personnel and organizational changes at the FBI amid longstanding political disputes over the bureau and allegations of political bias in federal law enforcement.
Bailey, a Republican who previously served as Missouri’s top law enforcement official, has been a vocal supporter of Patel’s efforts to reshape the agency.
And despite his sudden departure, Bailey made clear that he continues to support Patel and the direction of the bureau.
“I am confident Director Patel will continue to reform the FBI, combat violent crime, defend the homeland, ensure strong organizational accountability, and restore public trust in this institution of excellence,” he added.
Bailey also thanked President Donald Trump, Attorney General Todd Blanche and Patel for giving him the opportunity to serve.
During his tenure, Bailey became a visible member of the FBI’s leadership team, appearing alongside federal and state officials during law enforcement operations and promoting the bureau’s emphasis on combating violent crime.
He also participated in major investigations and enforcement initiatives as Patel’s leadership team sought to redirect bureau resources and address concerns among conservatives who had become deeply skeptical of the FBI.
The bureau has undergone extensive personnel and organizational changes since Patel became director in February 2025.
Patel has argued that the FBI needs to move away from what he describes as politicized enforcement and refocus the bureau on traditional law enforcement priorities, including violent crime, counterterrorism and threats to national security.
Those efforts have made Patel’s tenure closely watched in Washington as the Trump administration pursues broader changes across the federal government.
Bailey’s resignation now creates another vacancy near the top of the FBI less than two years into Patel’s tenure.
But Bailey said his decision was personal.
According to his public announcement, he is leaving Washington to return to Missouri and spend more time with his family.
Nothing in Bailey’s announcement indicated that he had been forced from his position or that his departure resulted from a dispute with Patel.
Instead, Bailey used his exit announcement to praise the FBI’s work during his tenure and publicly reaffirm his confidence in Patel.
His departure nevertheless removes a prominent member of Patel’s leadership team at a consequential moment for the bureau.
With Bailey preparing to leave Washington on Friday, Patel will now move forward without one of the senior officials who helped carry out the FBI overhaul during its first year under his leadership.
Culture
Fox News Under Fire After Hiring Notorious Democrat; Ex-Host Explodes
Fox News is bringing one of former New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo’s most prominent former aides onto its platform — a move that immediately triggered a furious response from one of the network’s own former personalities.
Melissa DeRosa, Cuomo’s longtime top lieutenant and former secretary to the governor, has been hired as a Fox News contributor and will appear on the network’s new weekly podcast, “The Girls.”
DeRosa will make her debut when the program premieres Oct. 1, Fox News Media announced Monday.
But the announcement quickly reopened one of the most bitter controversies surrounding Cuomo’s administration: New York’s handling and reporting of nursing home deaths during the COVID-19 pandemic.
Former Fox News meteorologist Janice Dean blasted the decision.
Dean’s mother-in-law and father-in-law died of COVID-19 in 2020 after living in New York long-term care facilities. Their deaths turned Dean into an outspoken critic of Cuomo and his administration as she pushed for answers about the state’s nursing home policies.
Following news of DeRosa’s Fox role, Dean unloaded.
“Melissa DeRosa helped smear the women who came forward about Andrew Cuomo’s harassment, and played a hand in undercounting nursing home deaths during COVID. Also tried to silence my advocacy.”
DeRosa served as secretary to the New York governor, becoming the first woman to hold the powerful position.
She resigned in August 2021 as sexual harassment allegations engulfed Cuomo’s administration.
But DeRosa had already become a central figure in the controversy surrounding the Cuomo administration’s handling of nursing home death information.
Months before her resignation, DeRosa acknowledged during a private call with Democratic state lawmakers that the administration had withheld nursing home death data while facing concerns about a possible investigation by President Donald Trump’s Justice Department.
The February 2021 disclosure intensified scrutiny over New York’s accounting of COVID-19 deaths among nursing home residents.
At the time, the state’s nursing home tally did not include residents who died after being transferred from nursing homes to hospitals, leaving thousands of deaths outside that particular count.
DeRosa later maintained that the administration had placed state lawmakers’ request for the information on hold while it prioritized responding to the federal inquiry.
The controversy did not end there.
A New York State Assembly investigation released in November 2021 concluded that Cuomo had not been fully transparent about nursing home resident deaths.
The investigation also concluded that Cuomo sexually harassed women and used state resources in connection with the production and promotion of his pandemic memoir.
Now DeRosa is returning to the political-media spotlight through Fox News.
She will appear on “The Girls,” a new weekly podcast featuring a rotating group of female co-hosts discussing politics, careers, family life and pop culture.
The premiere will also feature Fox personalities Rachel Campos-Duffy, Harris Faulkner and Kat Timpf.
New episodes are scheduled to be released Thursdays on YouTube, Spotify and Apple Podcasts.
The launch will also bring former ESPN personality Sam Ponder back into the spotlight following her 2024 departure from the sports network.
Ponder, the former host of “Sunday NFL Countdown,” will join DeRosa and the Fox personalities for the premiere episode.
But it is DeRosa’s addition that has already generated controversy before the first episode even airs.
For Dean, the issue is deeply personal.
She spent years publicly challenging Cuomo’s administration over its handling of nursing homes after losing two family members during the pandemic.
Now the former governor’s onetime top aide is joining the same media organization where Dean became one of the most visible critics of that administration.
And Dean made clear exactly what she thinks of the decision.
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