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Jena Sims puts in work, sea lion launches itself into a canoe, and they don’t build statues like they used to

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Hey, welcome back for a Thursday edition of Nightcaps.

The weekend is so close I can almost taste it, and it’s… it’s… uh… weekend-iness.

Here in Central Florida, it has been nice and toasty all week, and this morning my wife and I hit the grocery store because we’re the worst grocery shoppers of all time. I think we go at least every other day. Sometimes multiple days in a row.

As we were leaving, I said to my wife, “This feels like perfect beach weather. We should do a beach day soon.”

Then I remembered: I’m not a beach guy.

I’m able to relax a bit better than I could in my younger days, but I’m the kind of guy that can only hang on the beach for about an hour, maybe two, before I’m like, “Alright, back to the air conditioning.”

I can appreciate its splendor, but I’m not big on sand. I’m like Anakin Skywalker in that respect; I just can’t stand it.

SUNBURN, SKY-HIGH ELECTRIC BILLS, AND OTHER AWFUL THINGS THAT MAKE SUMMER QUIETLY TERRIBLE

And then the ocean itself is just one big soup full of monsters that are either venomous or have teeth.

Hell, the ocean itself does its best to kill you with riptides.

Give me a pool over the ocean any day. I’m an elite pool guy. I can hang out at a pool with the best of them, so that’s where you’ll find me this summer.

And as if I needed another reason to steer clear of the ocean, I’ve got one…

I came across a video of some people in a canoe race (isn’t that part of everyone’s algorithm?), but before you take a nap because of how boring that sounds, I promise you, it gets interesting.

It turns out you might want to start checking these races out for the crashes.

Not between canoes, but when some rogue sea lions decide to yeet themselves out of the water and into one of the canoe racers’ laps.

Who knows why the sea lion did that, but there’s a nonzero chance that he was doing that to crack up his buddies.

It’s like the ocean mammal version of some broccoli-cut idiot going into a convenience store, dumping a 2-liter bottle of Mr. Pibb on the floor, and then going, “Bro, calm down; it’s just a prank,” when people get mad.

PUNK ROCK DACHSHUND GOES ROGUE, YETI CUP VS LAVA, AND WAS THE SCI-FI HORROR CLASSIC ‘ALIEN’ A CAUTIONARY TALE?

I think someone needs to study this. Nature is cool, but it can also be boring as hell, so sea lions have to do something to entertain themselves and not eat their offspring.

Some people rest on their laurels.

Jena Sims is not one of those people.

The Sports Illustrated swimsuit model and wife of pro golfer Brooks Koepka has already made a name for herself, but she’s still hitting the gym to stay in tip-top runway shape.

Now that’s the kind of commitment to the craft we can all appreciate.

JENA SIMS PICKS OUT HER PGA CHAMPIONSHIP BIKINI, KAY ADAMS SUCKS DOWN SOME FRIES & NFL DRAFT WAGS!

The grind just does not stop.

I just learned today that there’s a 70-foot-tall statue of Lionel Messi… in India.

It would make sense to me if it was in Argentina, but this statue was only put up recently after he did a tour across India.

But here’s the problem: this is one wobbly-ass statue, and they have to move it so it doesn’t fall over.

Add this to the list of ways that everything is worse now.

There are ancient civilizations that built statues thousands of years ago, and they’re still standing right in the same place. There was never a point where someone was like, “Hey, fellas, we’ve got to move the ancient Sphinx (they probably just called it ‘The Sphinx’) because we’re concerned it might fall over and smash some goats or that guy trying to invent paper.”

No, they built a good statue, and it outlasted all of them.

That statue is newer than anything I have in my underwear drawer, and it’s already threatening to tip over.

But, hey, at least it looks like Messi.

Cristiano Ronaldo wasn’t so lucky…

I don’t need an electric vehicle, but I’m far from anti-EV. I think they have some cool benefits and I really dig Formula E racing, but they’re just not going to work for everyone, especially if you live in a more rural area.

But even I, as someone who kind of digs EVs, sometimes wonder what car companies are doing when they release some of these, and I’m not alone on that with the Ferrari Luce.

When I first saw that, my reaction was, “That’s about as ‘meh’ of a design as you can think of.”

Then I realized this car is over like $600,000, and that almost made me puke on myself, and a lot of people felt the same.

I just can’t figure out who will want this. Don’t get me wrong, someone will, but if you’re shelling out that kind of money for a Ferrari, won’t you want something a little, oh, I don’t know, louder?

We’ll see how it goes. Ferrari Formula 1 driver Lewis Hamilton took it for a spin, but if that wasn’t enough to convince potential buyers, they really called in the big guns.

We’re on Day 3 of Toothpastegate after Phillies star Bryce Harper stunned the nation by squirting the toothpaste straight into his mouth when brushing his teeth instead of applying it to the bristles.

That led to some guff from the San Diego Padres, but Eric is checking in today with a full report after taking the Harper method for a test drive:

DANICA PATRICK BELTS OUT TUNES IN INDY, BRYCE HARPER’S TOOTHPASTE APPLICATION IS WILD, AND ‘MACHO MANSON’

I tried the Harper brush method. I liked it. It worked well and was very efficient. Those who think it may be unsanitary: ask yourself how many times have you borrowed someone’s toothpaste and squeezed it onto your brush, then clipping off the paste by sliding it down the edge of your brush. How many people have rubbed their used brush on the end of that tube, doing the same thing? And how is that less nasty than squeezing the toothpaste right into your mouth, as most science shows that toothbrushes left in bathrooms have a certain amount of fecal matter on them?? How much fecal matter do u think is in someone’s mouth?? Think about that.

I knew at some point “fecal matter” would get dragged into this debate. It always does.

Eric makes some compelling points.

ZERO BS. JUST DAKICH. TAKE THE DON’T @ ME PODCAST ON THE ROAD. DOWNLOAD NOW!

I’ve already done my morning brushing, but I think I might have to kick the tires on this one. I’m intrigued. Everything I ever knew about toothpaste application may have been a lie.

I will report back… unless I forget, which is not only possible, but very likely.

That’s it for this Thursday edition of Nightcaps!

See you tomorrow!

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Tucker Carlson Officially Makes Shock Announcement — He’s Out

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Tucker Carlson Officially Makes Shock Announcement — He’s Out

A growing divide within the conservative movement is becoming increasingly difficult to ignore, as longtime commentator Tucker Carlson declared that he no longer considers himself a Republican, citing frustration with what he sees as the party’s abandonment of its America First roots.

Carlson made the remarks during a podcast appearance with hosts Travis Dhanraj and Karman Wong, where the discussion turned to the political landscape ahead of the upcoming midterm elections and whether voters remain satisfied with the direction of the Republican Party.

While Carlson made clear that he remains aligned with many conservative principles, he argued that some Republican leaders have drifted away from the priorities that helped fuel President Donald Trump’s rise and transformed the GOP into the dominant force it is today.

“I’m out,” Carlson said during the interview.

“And if I’m out, then I think a lot of other people are out.”

Carlson’s comments came as he discussed polling data and voter sentiment ahead of the next election cycle.

“I would not support the Republican party. There’s no chance I would support the Republican party,” he said.

The former Fox News host argued that certain Republican lawmakers had betrayed their voters by supporting policies he believes put foreign interests ahead of American priorities.

“How could I or any American voter support a political party that’s not loyal to the United States? That puts the interests of a foreign country above those of its own citizens?

“It’s not possible to vote for people like that, and I’m not going to.”

Carlson’s remarks highlight a growing debate inside conservative circles over the future direction of the Republican Party.

At the center of the disagreement is not President Trump himself, but rather how some Republicans have approached foreign policy, military intervention, and America’s role overseas.

Trump built his political movement on the promise of putting American interests first, securing the border, rebuilding the economy, restoring energy independence, and avoiding the endless foreign conflicts that frustrated many voters for decades.

Many of Trump’s supporters continue to view the America First agenda as one of the defining achievements of his political movement.

Carlson suggested that some Republicans have lost sight of those principles.

“I think I’ve voted Republican my entire life,” Carlson said.

“I’ve been a consistent defender for 35 years, of the Republican party. I mean, a very consistent defender.”

“But there’s no defending this because it’s immoral and it’s exactly the opposite of what a political party in a democracy is charged with doing — which is representing its own voters, its own citizens, its own nation.”

“And they’re not doing that,” Carlson concluded.

The comments come amid an ongoing debate among conservatives regarding foreign policy, particularly following recent tensions involving Iran and the broader Middle East.

Carlson has been one of the most vocal advocates of a non-interventionist approach that emphasizes American interests above foreign entanglements. Other conservatives, including commentators and lawmakers aligned with a more traditional hawkish worldview, have argued that a strong American presence abroad remains necessary to protect national security.

The disagreement intensified after military operations involving Iran earlier this year, with Carlson and several other prominent voices warning against policies they believe could lead to deeper involvement in overseas conflicts.

Despite those disagreements, Carlson has generally continued to support many of Trump’s domestic policies, including border security, immigration enforcement, energy production, and efforts to prioritize American workers and taxpayers.

The broader divide illustrates the ongoing evolution of the Republican Party under Trump’s influence.

For decades, the GOP was largely defined by traditional establishment conservatives who favored aggressive foreign policy and intervention abroad. Trump’s rise fundamentally reshaped that coalition, bringing millions of working-class voters, independents, and populist conservatives into the party.

Today, debates like the one Carlson has raised reflect a larger question facing Republicans: how closely the party will adhere to the America First principles that helped fuel Trump’s political success.

Whether Carlson ultimately returns to the Republican fold remains to be seen. But his comments underscore a reality that many political observers have noted in recent years: the future of the conservative movement is increasingly being shaped by debates over foreign policy, national sovereignty, and what it truly means to put America first.

As those discussions continue, one thing remains clear: the America First movement that transformed Republican politics is still driving much of the conversation inside the conservative movement today.

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Top Fox News Host Suffers Deranged Meltdown On LIVE TV — Doesn’t End Well…

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Top Fox News Host Suffers Deranged Meltdown On LIVE TV — Doesn’t End Well…

A growing divide within the conservative movement spilled into public view this weekend as Fox News host Mark Levin launched a blistering attack on President Donald Trump’s Iran strategy, accusing the administration of pressuring Israel while pursuing a diplomatic agreement designed to permanently prevent Iran from obtaining a nuclear weapon.

The dispute comes as the Trump administration continues negotiations with Tehran following a series of devastating military strikes that crippled Iran’s nuclear infrastructure, eliminated key regime leaders, and left the Islamic Republic in one of the weakest positions it has faced in decades.

President Trump and Vice President JD Vance have argued that the administration is negotiating from a position of overwhelming strength after demonstrating a willingness to use military force when necessary. Their goal, they say, is simple: ensure Iran never obtains a nuclear weapon while avoiding another endless war in the Middle East.

Levin, however, remains deeply skeptical.

During a fiery monologue that lasted more than 17 minutes on Saturday, the longtime conservative commentator accused members of the administration of unfairly targeting Israel while becoming too optimistic about Iran’s intentions.

“I want to say to people in and out of the administration: stop trashing, smearing, bullying the little state of Israel. Stop cozying up to and telling us that the enemy regime in Iran is now more rational, more moderate, and a regime that we can deal with,” Levin demanded. “When just a few months ago they slaughtered 50,000 people, they’re still hanging young people today and, if they had a nuclear missile today, they’d fire it into our country as sure as I’m alive.”

Levin also rejected any suggestion that Israel should allow outside governments to dictate its security decisions.

“I don’t know what’s going on, but if people think they can bully a little country, Israel — a people that have existed 4,000 years through the Babylonians and the Persians, through the Romans and the Third Reich — into surrendering their defense and their decision on how to secure their country, they get another thing coming,” Levin continued. “I think it’s outrageous.”

The criticism did not stop there.

Levin also used social media to question several administration policies, including reports surrounding a Boeing 747 gifted by Qatar and modified for use supporting presidential airlift operations.

“If it’s legal and other countries do it so be it. Do you think wealthy countries should be able to lavish gifts on our government?” Levin wrote.

His sharpest criticism, however, focused on the administration’s efforts to secure a broader peace agreement with Iran and its proxies.

“Item #1 in the MOU provides there’s an immediate and permanent end to the war and that includes Hezbollah in Lebanon. Iran is Hezbollah,” Levin posted. “What’s the enforcement mechanism? Nothing. Israel defends itself after constant attacks from Hezbollah and is admonished for it. Its interests are not aligned with ours, we’re told. It’s endangering the peace deal. This is beyond nuts.”

In another post, Levin argued that current ceasefire efforts were coming at Israel’s expense.

“Apparently as long as Israeli soldiers are killed the ceasefire is holding,” Levin claimed.

The administration has strongly rejected suggestions that it is abandoning Israel or weakening its support for America’s closest ally in the Middle East.

President Trump responded directly Sunday with a warning aimed squarely at Iran and its regional proxies.

“Iran must immediately stop their highly paid PROXIES in Lebanon from causing trouble. If they don’t, we’ll hit Iran very hard again, just like we did last week, only harder!!!” Trump posted on Truth Social.

For supporters of the administration, that message demonstrates exactly why they remain confident in Trump’s approach. They argue that no modern president has shown a greater willingness to confront Iran militarily while simultaneously seeking a diplomatic resolution that serves American interests.

Vice President JD Vance and Secretary of State Marco Rubio have both emphasized that any final agreement would require Iran to permanently abandon its nuclear ambitions, submit to extensive inspections, and comply with strict verification requirements before receiving any economic benefits.

Administration officials also note that no sanctions have been lifted, no frozen assets have been released, and no direct payments have been authorized.

Instead, they argue that Trump has successfully put Iran in a position where the regime must choose between compliance and continued isolation.

The disagreement highlights a broader debate that has been developing inside the Republican Party for years.

Traditional foreign-policy hawks often favor maintaining maximum military pressure and remain deeply skeptical of negotiations with hostile regimes.

Trump’s America First coalition generally supports overwhelming military strength but prefers leveraging that strength into favorable deals that avoid long-term military entanglements.

Supporters of the president argue that Trump’s strategy reflects the same formula that has defined much of his foreign policy: peace through strength.

Strike hard when necessary. Demonstrate unquestionable resolve. Negotiate from a position of power. And avoid the costly nation-building efforts and endless conflicts that frustrated many Americans for decades.

As negotiations continue, the debate between Levin and the Trump administration reflects a larger question facing conservatives: how best to secure American interests abroad while staying true to the America First principles that have reshaped the Republican Party.

For now, President Trump appears committed to proving that military strength and diplomacy are not opposing strategies—but complementary tools for achieving lasting peace and protecting America’s national security.

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It’s Over! The House Votes 396-13 — Trump Just Won!

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It’s Over! The House Votes 396-13 — Trump Just Won!

In a rare display of bipartisan cooperation, the U.S. House of Representatives overwhelmingly passed the amended 21st Century ROAD to Housing Act this week, advancing a package of reforms designed to tackle America’s housing affordability crisis while delivering on several key priorities championed by President Donald Trump.

The legislation passed by a decisive 396-13 vote, reflecting broad agreement that soaring housing costs, rising rents, and limited inventory have pushed homeownership out of reach for millions of Americans.

Supporters say the bill addresses one of the country’s most pressing economic challenges by cutting red tape, increasing housing supply, strengthening lending opportunities, and helping ensure that American families—not large corporations—have a fair shot at buying homes.

The legislation combines elements of previous House and Senate proposals and seeks to address housing shortages that have contributed to record-high home prices in many parts of the country.

House Financial Services Committee Chairman French Hill praised the measure as a practical, results-oriented solution focused on expanding opportunities for working Americans.

“This bill prioritizes American families by expanding homeownership, enhancing affordability, reducing burdensome regulations that drive up costs, and increasing housing supply nationwide,” Chairman Hill stated.

“Importantly, it delivers on President Trump’s call to limit institutional investors from competing with the American people as they seek to purchase a home,” Hill added.

The legislation includes a variety of reforms aimed at accelerating housing construction and reducing barriers that have slowed development for years.

Among its key provisions, the bill streamlines federal permitting requirements, reduces lengthy environmental review processes for certain redevelopment and infill housing projects, and encourages innovative housing solutions such as modular and manufactured homes.

The measure also provides grants to local governments willing to modernize zoning laws and remove restrictions that limit new construction.

Supporters argue that restrictive zoning policies, excessive permitting delays, and government bureaucracy have significantly contributed to America’s housing shortage.

Rather than relying on massive new federal spending programs, the legislation focuses on empowering local communities, encouraging private-sector investment, and removing obstacles that make housing more expensive.

The bill also raises loan limits for multifamily housing developments, creating incentives for apartment construction and expanding options for renters and first-time buyers alike.

Additional provisions strengthen rural housing initiatives, expand support for veterans seeking housing, modernize financing for smaller mortgage loans, and increase the role community banks can play in local lending markets.

Community banks have long argued that excessive regulations have made it more difficult for them to serve homebuyers and construction projects in their local communities.

Democratic Rep. Maxine Waters acknowledged the seriousness of the housing crisis despite broader political disagreements.

“America is in the middle of a full-blown affordable housing and homelessness crisis, and working families are burdened by skyrocketing rents and a housing market that is pushing homeownership further out of reach,” Waters said.

One of the most notable aspects of the legislation is its effort to curb the growing influence of large institutional investors in the housing market.

For years, investment firms and corporate landlords have purchased thousands of single-family homes, often outbidding families and first-time homebuyers. Critics argue that this trend has driven up prices while transforming communities into rental markets dominated by large corporations.

The legislation includes targeted restrictions designed to discourage large institutional investors from acquiring additional single-family homes.

That approach aligns closely with President Trump’s housing agenda.

Throughout his second administration, Trump has repeatedly argued that homeownership should remain a cornerstone of the American Dream and that government policies should prioritize families over Wall Street investors.

In his National Homeownership Month proclamation earlier this month, Trump emphasized the importance of restoring affordability and expanding opportunities for future homeowners.

“During National Homeownership Month, my Administration recommits to making housing more affordable so that young Americans and hardworking families can raise children, build memories, and create a future in a home of their own,” Trump said.

The president has frequently blamed the housing crisis on “reckless spending, burdensome regulations, and failed housing policies” implemented under previous administrations, as well as “mass illegal immigration and large institutional investors” that have increased pressure on housing supply.

Trump has also taken executive actions aimed at reducing institutional ownership of single-family homes, lowering mortgage costs, and strengthening federal housing programs.

“Under my leadership, America will be a Nation where homes belong to families — not corporations,” Trump said.

At the same time, Trump has emphasized the importance of protecting the value of homes already owned by millions of Americans.

“I don’t want to drive housing prices down. I want to drive housing prices up for people that own their homes. Existing housing, people who own their homes, we’re going to keep them wealthy. We’re going to keep those prices up. We’re not going to destroy the value of their homes so that somebody that didn’t work very hard can buy a home,” Trump said during a Cabinet meeting earlier this year.

He has also repeatedly summarized his housing philosophy with a simple message:

“Homes are built for people, not for corporations, and America will not become a nation of renters.”

With overwhelming bipartisan support in the House and growing concern over affordability nationwide, supporters hope the legislation will mark a significant step toward restoring homeownership opportunities and ensuring that the American Dream remains within reach for future generations.

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